wellness
I am constantly trying to find myself, find my soul and who I am and what that means. Constantly trying to improve myself and my peaceful mind and constantly challenged by life. For the last few months I really have not been feeling physically well and I could be super focused on not feeling well right now as I am still trying to recuperate from the quick onset of bronchitis in the midst of extensive business travel, which makes it even more difficult to recover. I am not sure if it is the weather or the astrological energy, but probably a combination. I have heard many people tell me just how tired they all are, so I know that it is not just my imagination. All I want to do is sleep and hibernate, yet spring has arrived and my internal clock says it is time to get moving.
Whether you believe in astrology and astronomy, we have been straddled with a ton of crazy energy the past month; the Sun is in Pisces, we had a full Solar Eclipse, with Chiron -the wounded healer crossing the Sun and that combination cause a lot of people to get sick, activate dormant energies and purge the unwanted emotions. Now we are on the crux of a Lunar Eclipse and that should seal the deal and close up any remnants needing to go. I am hoping this is the last week of feeling icky because I truly just want to feel well again.
It has been a struggle to be creative and keep up with writing all of my ideas and sharing them with you. It has given me a really good chance of figuring out what I really want, right now. I want to hit the lottery, in a big way, so that I can quit my full time day job and just focus on the things that I really want to do. I want to be able to just write my blog and make really great Facebook, Twitter and Instagram posts. I want to be able to work in my garden and simple have the time to clean my house properly. I am forever juggling and prioritizing and half assing the cleaning so that I can spend time with my family and my blog. It just never seems fair; there is never enough time.
I know many of you feel the same way and might often think of how unfair life can be – having to spend so much time earning money so that you can have 2 days off to enjoy it – or really just 2 days off to sleep, do laundry, clean the mess only to have to do it all over again come Monday. Sure, I can get caught up in the unfairness, but I choose to focus on Gratitude instead. Gratitude for having a job, for having a dirty home to clean, for having clothes to wash, for having dirty dishes – for they held the meal that I was fortunate to have to eat. When we break down life’s inconveniences in the form of Gratitude, we can see things differently.
All of that Gratitude does not mean that I am not tired or that I am not feeling well and I am trying to figure out right now how I can feel physically better. Maybe it is the weather or the energies around us – maybe it is Menopause? I do not want to believe that menopause is affecting me physically, but I cannot ignore it. Maybe this is why I feel so shitty. I really thought women were over exaggerating, but there is something to be said for hot flashes and night sweats waking me up every hour; how can anyone get a restful night’s sleep when they are woke up 4 or 5 times a night? Me, who is always cold figured that a hot flash would just warm me up to the point of normal – wrong. I can no longer wear pajamas to bed, I need to keep water at my bedside and for someone who typically sleeps with several down comforters- find myself turning on the ceiling fan and turning off the heater in 35 degree weather. I still have to find the Gratitude in this phase of my life knowing that a year from now, I may feel wonderful again.
One way that I find wellness is by using natural remedies and my favorite is a hot salt bath with essential oils, candles and crystals. When I am not feeling well and when I am feeling well, I take a hot bath. It helps me recenter and the salts help sooth my body and eliminate toxins. Don’t believe me? Google it and you will see that there is something to be said about salt baths. Chicken soup and herbs also help to uplift me. They are a band-aid for a few hours and at least help me get through a particularly rough day. Being in nature also does this for me in other ways; nature allows me to be present just observing with my eyes, ears and senses the beauty that is around me- the magic of nature feeds my gratitude and my soul.
I know I am ranting, but this is my blog and I am just being honest and letting you into my world and letting you into who I am. I am be no means perfect, but I am constantly looking for the feeling of perfection; the feeling of the well rested and well, the feeling of joy and happiness and on that note it is time for a nap!