Haunted – Sometimes I am Afraid and Scared.
“Are you aware, do you care- are you scared of the experience?”
Let’s answer the first question- Are you aware? Can you sense in the darkness something lurking around you? Can you feel it in the core of your being? You do not need to see anything physical with your eyes because every fiber of your being knows it. You may have shivers, hairs may stand up on end all over your body or you could feel the rush of adrenaline throughout your bloodstream telling you to run. I have spent most of my life feeling this way, not for a long time though since taking back my power seven years ago when I moved to my current home despite the portal here.
Let’s answer the second question – Do you care? Of course, you do, otherwise you would not be reading this.
Third question- Are you scared of the experience? Yes and No, right? No matter how frightening the Underworld is, it is like a train wreck or a car crash, we cannot take our eyes and attention away from it.
I cannot predict when I will be frightened or not; it happens so quickly or subtly that it isn’t until I am in the thick of a haunting and it is too late; except, our bodies always know before our minds have time to catch up with reality.
I do not know if it is because October is here, it is raining (great conductor for spiritual activity) that I have been slightly frightened; even writing this is cause my gut or Solar Plexus Chakra to contract and tighten. The Veil is Thinning and my body feels it; the heightened electricity in the air. I am just waiting here for a cold chill or hot breath on my neck or a whisper in my ear to send shivers down my spine. The recurring dream a few nights ago fringes on nightmare and still haunts me in my waking hours.
With Today being Friday, October 13… Friday the 13th what a better time for some ghost stories. Believe it or not, many cultures love and embrace Friday the 13th as the number 13 is considered lucky. When I was younger, I always waited for something to happen on Friday the 13th, something magical. The most exciting Friday the 13th was June 13, 1980, when the original Friday the 13th movie
was out in theaters. My friend Michael and I went to see it. He was always the prankster with me knowing that I loved horror films, yet was easily frightened by real life monsters. And it never got old, every weekend he would hide in the bushes outside my house and jump out, in a costume, and scare the shit out of me every time. Sometimes he
This is Barlow
would just whisper “Watch out for Barlow”as I was leaving his house for my walk home; that was enough to make me run the entire half block home- (Barlow, the vampire from Stephen King’s Salem’s Lot), Barlow). If you’ve ever seen him or the movie, you would understand. Anyway, back to Jason Vorheese and Friday the 13th movie. Once the movie let out, we proceeded to the parking lot; I walked to the passenger side of his van and waited for him to unlock my door and let me in. It was after mid-night and the parking lot was emptying quickly and I waited. I kept calling for Michael asking him to hurry up. I walked around the van; no Michael. 30 minutes passed and the van was the last vehicle in the parking lot and still no Michael; now I was getting upset. We had no cell phones in 1980 and the nearest “pay phone” was too far away, if I left to call someone I might get left behind, plus I still did not know where he disappeared to. Suddenly something, someone grabbed both of my ankles and pulled me under the van. I hit my head on the asphalt and was screaming at the top of my lungs; I just saw Friday the 13th and now I am going to be murdered! This is what 15 & 17 year olds do for frights and giggles. It was Michael, again, scaring the shit out of me for a laugh; he did it a lot in our growing up years and he was one of my favorite friends. I lost him in 1984, but the memories still remain and he visits; as a matter of fact, Michael is here now, helping me to retell this story, these stories. He has been popping up quite a bit over the last few weeks as the Veil begins to Thin with each passing day leading up to Halloween and Dia de los Muertos. I welcome his presence, it is sweet and gentle; I get a warm, homey feeling when he arrives and always a smile on my face and a deep sense of sadness in my heart and my solar plexus; a longing for that friendship and laughter combined with frights and giggles.
Several years ago, in a dream sequence, I was house shopping with my Mother (Deceased) and my Daughter (Living). We were looking for the perfect house and location. We stumble upon a broken-down cottage with no sign, but the property was filled with Pine Trees and Victorian Gardens overlooking the ocean. The interior had water dripping everywhere, electrical cords sticking out of the walls and ceilings; sparking from the water trickling on them. It was hideous, but I saw the potential. Dream experts say that Houses in dreams represent the Self and how you see the house is how you truly are or how you subconsciously see yourself. Hmmmm. Really? Any-who, over the years the house has improved greatly, but it is still haunted. There are secret rooms upstairs; the more I discover the more there are. More dream interpretation here- to discover hidden rooms and things within a “dream house” indicates the hidden things within the Self that have yet to be discovered. There is always a huge triple staircase, like in an Opera House or Theater that leads to the upper floors. A dining room and kitchen sit at the landing. The hidden rooms jut off to the left and right of this centerpiece.
This week, I was back in the “dream house”, much activity was occurring with my ex-husband making repairs in the basement and my daughter having a birthday party in the main living room. What grabbed my attention in this dream was a chess board placed in front of a piano. I sat down on the floor to examine the chess board. The pieces were made of hand-carved marble. The Queens were shaped like Chinese Dragons and I acknowledged that was a great sign. The Knight and the King were carved as such when I noticed that the Knight winked at me and I saw his lips moving; he was whispering something to me. My immediate thought went to Evil. Whatever it was, it was Evil and reminded me of when my Madame Alexander dolls would talk to each other in the middle of the night; I hate dolls, or the time my daughter’s Furby’s had a conversation with each other at 3:00 a.m., on opposite sides of the room AND neither had batteries in them; they had long since been removed for this very reason. I looked to my right and saw a Native American man and woman sitting, assuming they were guests of my daughter’s party. I knew they saw the Knight talking to me and inches closer and closer toward me. I asked him if he was in-fact Native American; the woman continued to stare straight ahead. His nod confirmed my question. I asked him to help me with the chess piece; he joined the woman in the blank staring contest. “Do you not see what is happening?” “Don’t you know that you are of the land, you are my protector, the powerful one, grounded in the Earth; nothing can harm you and you must protect me from this!”, I pleaded. He said nothing, but shifted his gaze directly to my own eyes and within that I felt at peace; he was there to help and protect me. I was lucid enough in that moment that I told my sleeping self to remember this dream, remember every detail. I scanned my sleeping brain for the entire sequence of this dream, taking mental notes of all the details; something I only recall doing a dozen times over my lifetime. With cerebral notes in place and confirmed I woke. It was 1:30-ish and I was shaking with fear that something in my bedroom was controlling the Knight chess piece and projecting it into my dream; the one night that I turned all the lights in my house off because my daughter was away for the night- Remember, I must leave all the lights on in the house because of The Apartment; shame on me trying to give my electric bill and my wallet a break. Lesson learned.
Now back
to those Furby’s – must have been 1996 and yes it frightened me. My daughter and I shared a King-sized bed because sleeping alone was not an option when living with ghosts. I jumped out of bed, 3:00 a.m., grabbed a trash bag, threw the Furbies in the bag, tied it, opened the garage door and flung them as quickly as I could- door slammed. I do not remember falling back to sleep that night.
Several years earlier; same shared bed, I was woken from a deep sleep with such night terrors that I could not open my eyes. The feeling of Evil was surrounding me and my body felt it even though my brain was sleeping. It is an electrical feel; a tightening of the stomach combined with wanting to curl up into the fetal position and hide under my comforter and scream “Go Away!” Once I mustered up my courage, I opened my eyes to find two Shadow People standing at the end of the bed. One was very tall, the other slightly shorter. At first, I thought maybe it was my Grandparents, but logic kicked in, benevolent ancestors would NOT give off the vibe of Evil; they were imposters. I nudged my daughter because I was so scared; she saw them. We held each other’s hands as the Shadow People just stood at the end of the bed motionless. 
Logic kicks in again, I am awake and remember one of my cousins told me that if this ever happened to me to clap my hands together very loud (to break the energy) and tell the entities to leave and reclaim the space as my own. CLAP! “Go back from where you came, this space is mine, you do not belong here and you are not welcomed here”, CLAP! And just like that, they were gone. Another sleepless night. I sat up until dawn wondering if these entities were the same beings that would turn our televisions to static in the middle of the night at 3:00 a.m. My daughter only slept in here own bedroom once in this house for that same reason. There is power in numbers and we supported each other in our fear. I was so much younger then, only 27 years old, she was 5 years old. We have both learned so much since those early days.
Not all experiences are scary. Sometimes that are fun and full of laughter. When I was a teenager, just walking down the street in a highly charged mood, whether it be elated or angry, would cause street lights to blow; one by one as I approached. My friends thought it was one of my coolest “tricks”, this same energy effect that I was giving off has prevented me from wearing watches and I have a full collection of beautiful, expensive time pieces in a beautiful and useless jewelry box.
Oh, and the time that my daughter, nephew and I were sitting in this very living room of my current home watching a movie when several photographs that I keep up on a shelf in the kitchen began to float across the kitchen towards the living room. I did not notice; only the look on the kid’s faces, “What is wrong with the two of you?” They point across the room, which is to my left. I turn my head and they fall to the floor immediately after I caught their suspension. They were pictures of my Mother. It was here and this was her way of saying “I am here, I am watching our Saturday night movie!”. I often find pictures laying on the kitchen floor, even if they are tucked away in a closet on the other side of the house. Randomly, old black and whites show up there and I feel this is captured image of the relative trying to make contact with me. Of course, I ask my family if they were in the closet, were they looking at photos. The answer is always “No!”
Animals are very sensitive and receptive to Spirt. All animals. It is said that an animal, wild or domesticated, can feel the energy from another animal, human or Spirit up to 75 feet away. They see through an unusual lens with a wider spectrum range of light; they see Spirit and Angels when many of us cannot. I frequently find my animals (cats and dogs) following something with their eyes, barking or growling and they too become frightened. Their behavior says it all showing the type of Spirit that is present. The strangest animal/Spirit experience was between our rescue Beagle and the Unknown Entity in the hallway here in this home. He kept giving the Spirit his paw and then then rolled on his back for belly rubs. My daughter was so upset that he could see and play with this Spirit and she could see nothing. Pay attention to your own animal’s behavior, you may be surprised by what is living with you when you are aware.
I do not mind when relatives, angels or animals visit. It is always pleasant and feels good. That is the difference when encountering Spirit. Your body will let you know before your mind, eyes, ears and nose; lovely is Lovely and foul is Foul – you will know. I also do not mind when clients or friend’s relatives and animals show up to send a message; that energy is pleasant, but a little draining. It is a different feeling than if it is somebody that belongs to me.
I will leave you with one last experience of the thousands I can chose from. This house is not without its own Spirits. I have the two original owners; small meek and simple people. They built this home 70 years ago and lived here until 1993. They have checked in on us a few times shortly after I purchased this home. It was pleasant and freaky at the same time as they were channeling between my daughter and myself simultaneously. She was telepathically sending me the words and images of what they looked like and through her mind I could see them. I grabbed my sketch pad and a pencil and began to draw. She confirmed when I was finished the likeness was uncanny. Then there is the woman that froze in the snow. She lived here from 1993 until 2009, until her untimely and tragic death. She was on her way home from a night out drinking with her friends. She was dropped off at the end of the driveway; the weather was turning with blizzard-like conditions. She slipped and hit her head on a large boulder on the lawn, fell and was not discovered for two days; frozen. The family placed the home on the market and in walks Me. Our first year here, every morning at 5:56 a.m. the front door handle would click, twist and turn as if someone was trying to get in the house. I could set my watch to it. This is residual energy, but energy just the same. Why I did not try and clear her away sooner, I could not tell you. I would patiently wait at the door every morning to see the handle twist. I invited people over to experience the phenomena so that I could reaffirm my sanity.
She visited several of my family and friends that have stayed the night; yelling at them while they were in full slumber to “Get out of my House!” Full disclosure – I knew this girl growing up. I had photographs of her from our earlier days…. long story. Each time I was informed of her haunting, I would pull out six random photos of six random girls/women and ask, “Do any of these photos resemble the ghost that you saw?” Each person picked out the frozen woman (withholding the name for privacy reasons). We could feel a slight sense of Evil in the home when she was around, but I truly think it was merely her dense and conflicted energy. She always had a drug and alcohol problem for as long as I can remember and ultimately the antecedent that lead to her death. Weekly Sage and Incent cleansing finally put her at bay, until her young son recently died from a drug overdose. The place that he called home for two-thirds of his life was where he returned after the tragedy and she came running right back here for him. It was a rough two weeks here are few months ago, but I sent them both off and into the light, reunited once again and in their favorite place. They are at peace, finally.